Journal Entry: Things better left unsaid

Even between two people a hierarchy will form. It's human nature. The more people you add to it, the more complex it becomes.

There are about 250 of us now. We haven't reached the capacity of how many this villa complex can support, but we've already grown far beyond my expectations and it won't be long until we do. If we want to grow more, we'll need a hierarchy with explicit rules. One with myself at the top dictated by nothing but the implicit rules of social order and a hope won't last much longer.

I believe I've been negligent in not deciding this sooner. Further...what has made this clear to me is rather pitiful.

I was enjoying some tea in the pavilion. Then, Criff sat on my lap. She refused to move.

I can usually tell when people are sneaking up on me but she may as well have been a ghost materializing on top of me. I'm embarrassed to admit it. I must be more exhausted than I thought. That must have been clear to her too, because she wasted no time on commenting on my eye bags.

It's not as if I'm some prude but it's the first time someone has been so forward. I've ignored the comments and the touches up until now, but she insisted on making herself known today. So, I turned one of my pastries into a snake. Maybe it was petty of me, but it solved the issue without any unkind words being said or force used. For now.

Upon reflection, I'm certain this was calculated. There were people around but no one close enough to hear what we were saying. To anyone passing it must have looked like PDA between two teenagers. Which is just...

If the others think I'm weak-minded enough to be manipulated or content to let others get away with doing less because of my libido I'll lose their faith.

I'll think of how to deter her later. For now, sleep.